Tag Archives: parenting

back on the horse

02 Tuesday Mar 2010

Posted by in Foodies, Motherhood

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Well, hello there.

I am back from our trip to Rome.  It was a fascinating trip, full of surprises and lots of fabulous food and one late hiccup in the plan.  We had never been away from the kids for a full week, and to land 5000 miles away pushed me out to the edge of my parental comfort zone.  The edge is a good place to be sometimes.  For all involved.  But that umbilical cord…  now, I’m sure you know that I do not mean the one that connected me to each of them at birth, because we did cut that one.  I mean the unseen cord that stretches from my heart to theirs, and boy oh boy, it stretched until it hurt.

Of course, eating gelato by the Trevi Fountain with people I love did help me get over it for the moment, as did one great meal after another.  I love to experience all the local specialties when I travel, and Rome had some great and memorable ones.

I was put in charge of choosing the restaurants (my pleasure), and communicating with all taxi drivers (mixed results).  I did a crash course of Italian for Travelers before I left, but when put in a pressure situation, it all flew out of my head, except to tell them that “I am learning Italian, but I do not speak much”.  I think I said that to everyone, no matter what they said to me.  May have made them wonder what exactly I was learning in Italian.  The other strategy was to say “Prego” at any time, since it seemed to have 12 innocuous meanings.  In retrospect, I did OK at the communicating part, and we ended up where we were going.  But maybe that is not saying much.

Other than the food, one of my favorite parts was strolling (roaming?) down the narrow back streets and impossibly narrow alleys, looking at the architecture above and the well-worn cobble streets under my feet.  The knowledge that we could be run down by a zooming Smartcar at any moment just added to the excitement.  I actually ran into one moving car (versus the other way around) but neither of us suffered any damage.

International intrigue, jane-style!  I am not a high adrenaline kind of gal.

Unless you count eating  Rigatoni con la Pajata, pasta with a sauce of milk-fed calf’s intestine cooked with tomatoes, salt pork, garlic and spices, and topped with grated Pecorino cheese.  This was seriously one of my very favorite dishes.  Amazing, complex flavor.  Romans are known as “popolo mangereccio” (people who are fond of eating) and this apparently includes a fondness of eating every part of the animal, and I have to agree it is tasty.  (Even better than Pork Belly Tacos from Mexico.)

I leave you today with a sense of relief that a tumultuous February has ended, and for me each month starts with a brand new shiny day called the 1st, which has always felt like a new start to me.  Start by starting.  And remember all the good things along the way.

misnomer-over

08 Monday Jun 2009

Posted by in Motherhood

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What smarty-party-pants came up with the idea of a kid sleepover?  Someone who was going out of town overnight?  In our household, the sleepover is rarely a good idea.  We all do best with a good night’s sleep.  No one here is a natural early riser.  We still enforce a fairly consistent bedtime at their age, which is SO NOT COOL, but the kids are happier and healthier that way.  I am not particularly interested in being cool.   Being cool is not my job.  And as Bill Cosby once said, “Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.”  Amen to that.  Everything is hunky-dory around here as long as things get quiet and everyone gets sleep.  Me included.

Then the sleepover invitation arrives in the mail, or via the more spontaneous phone call.  Dang!  Now I have to be the bad guy, or live with the consequences.  And the worst part?  People do not even call it the right name, since we all know no one sleeps.  It is a stayupover.  Or a stayawakeover, maybe.  Let’s just be frank about the situation.

Sometimes I do wish I could be a more Fun Mom, the host of the the house where all the kids gravitate.  The one with endless patience for noise and chaos and general frivolity and merrymaking.  I know women like that, and their kids seem well rested enough.  Those moms are not wearing a straitjacket (unless they are wearing it to bed during a stayawakeover).  I don’t want to be the host of the house with the wailing and gnashing of teeth of biblical proportions.  Can’t we all just have some fun and then everybody catch some happy Zzzzzz?

Please?

Okay, okay, so it is a kid’s right of passage, to stay up all night.  I am happy my kids have good friends who want to hang out and have fun.  Everyone recovers and life goes back to normal (a mere 72 hours later).  And normal only seems normal if something abnormal happens once in a while.  Parenting provides such endless opportunities to be The Uncool Bad Guy for their own good and safety and character-building.  I’ll try to lighten up about the sleeplessover, and have my own LetItGo-over.  A GetOverItAlready-over.  We can have a nap-over the next day.

Still, I am going to propose a radical idea to parents everywhere — the sleepmoreover.  If we form a united front, perhaps we can convince them that sleep is the new cool…

birds and bees: a cautionary tale

03 Wednesday Jun 2009

Posted by in Motherhood

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Today’s rule of thumb:  when trying to prepare youngest son for 4th grade human growth and development class by sharing pertinent and potentially shocking information ahead of time, it is a really, really, REALLY good idea to check the curriculum first.

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Like most of my escapades, this adventure started out innocently enough.  Older child had found said 4th grade human growth and development class quite stressful and uncomfortable.  Presumably, for him, such information would best be discussed in the privacy of his own home.  Or preferably, not at all.

Ever.

Too embarrassing for words.

So, since the Little One had been asking me A LOT of questions, I thought I would share some key pieces of information the night before The Class, so he wouldn’t be shocked in front of all his friends.

Oh, was he shocked.  And awed.  And, frankly, pretty disgusted.

The situation discussed in appropriate, accurate terms in a straightforward, honest way about a natural, loving act?  This situation had never crossed his mind.  That goes there and then that happens??? He was flabbergasted.  I felt confident and reassured in my motherly role, teaching my child important life lessons and setting the stage for future open and honest discussions about this important topic.  I was relieved I had saved him the embarrassment of learning these things in front of all his peers.

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Fast forward to dinner the following evening.

Youngest: “It turns out human growth and development class doesn’t start until tomorrow.”

Me:  “That’s nice.  At least you are ready!”  Reassuring motherly smile.

Dad:   Smirk. ( He is so mature. )

Oldest:  “You know Mom, that class only covers the P word.”

Me:  Silently wonder what the P word is.

Oldest:  “You know, puberty.  And just the boy parts.”

Me:  Realization slowly dawning on my pea brain. “Really?  Nothing else?  No other details??  Like about where babies come from???”

Oldest:  “No!  But I sure learned a lot of new things last night when I listened (read: eavesdropped) to your conversation with (youngest) while I was brushing my teeth.”

All:   Awkward Silence.

Dad:   Smirk.

Me:  “Oh, never mind then.  Please pass the broccoli.”

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Another stellar parenting moment.

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Okay, so arguably it is still best to explain these things before they learn it on the bus.  I thought they had already heard a version of It on the bus.  He has already shared graphic hand gestures, questionable anatomical terms and sundry mysterious concepts from the bus rides, asking me what they meant.  Apparently the bus is not quite as technically informative as I imagined.  And the look of sheer horror on dear Youngest’s face when I explained It?  …oh dear.  He was not ready.  The older one did not even know yet.  I goofed.

So, I did what any self-respecting parent would do the following morning (which was today):  I told him I had been kidding and made the whole ridiculous thing up.  HA!  Funny Mommy!!  So silly!!!  Because who would ever put that into there ON PURPOSE!  That’s just crazy talk!

We’ll see what he shares this time after he comes home on the bus…